“Different Being a Girlfriend Than Friend”

I share this particular letter by a new POCF to show others they are not alone and to show remind the seasoned POCF that we are incredible people who adapt to changes and make this industry what it is. It would implode without us, and I hope you understand the immense value you bring to the table just by being YOU!

In addition, it makes my heart swell with happiness to know this blog and Instagram are helpful resources for women out there! Your comments and DMs help others feel seen, heard, and less alone. That, in addition to empowerment and reminding you of how great you are, is always my main goal.

Whether you’re a seasoned POCF or Greenhorn (newbie), I’d love to hear how you relate to the letter in the comments.

As always, thank you for being here. I send you much Love & #POCFpride! xo Megan

Letter: “It’s Different Being a Girlfriend Than a Friend”

Hi Megan, First, I want to say that what you are doing is super cool.

You can look up almost anything on the internet or TikTok, and this is something I looked for when needing to cope with things and was surprised to find almost no one talking about it.

For me, it’s not a new concept, and I knew exactly what I signed up for when I started dating my boyfriend.

I grew up in Seattle, and a lot of the guys growing up went fishing. Some for a few years, and others are lifers. I’ve known my boyfriend since we were nine years old but were only friends. In our 20s, he dated a friend of mine. When he was gone, we’d do the girl things and plan vacations for when he was back.

A few months ago, we started talking which I would’ve never predicted I’d end up with him.

I knew I would struggle with this lifestyle because I knew what it takes, but we are so good together that it’s worth it for me to try.

What I didn’t understand is how different it is being his friend vs. girlfriend.

He’s on his first trip since we started dating, and it’s been three months now, which seems to be taking a toll on both of us. Your blog was not only comforting but honest and unapologetic, which I appreciated so much.

I’m struggling with things I didn’t even know I would feel, and even though every person and situation is different, this life isn’t something my girlfriends understand, so thank you for sharing so much.

Maybe one day, I will be brave enough and join you in sharing stories and advice. 


What part of this letter resonates with you? Which part can you relate to? Please share in the comments below; we’d love to hear from you!


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  1. Thank you for sharing this heartfelt letter, Megan! It’s incredibly important to create spaces where people can find support and solidarity, especially in navigating unique challenges like those faced by partners of fishermen. This letter beautifully captures the complexities and nuances of relationships, highlighting the shift from friendship to romance and the adjustments that come with it. I’m sure many can relate to the feelings of uncertainty and longing expressed here. Your openness and empathy shine through in your blog and Instagram, providing a beacon of support for women everywhere. Thank you for fostering such a welcoming community!

    • Hi, Martin. I am so touched. Thank you so much for taking the time to write. I read your comment this weekend and I was brought to tears…twice. Everything you said is exactly what I want for our community, and to hear that my energy is being reflected that way is really special and validating. POCF’s deserve and need more, and I’ll continue to figure out how to provide that. I hope we can find incredible funding one day to make this an institution of resources, support, and community. Thank you so much again for your message. It came at a time that I really needed to hear it. Take care, and thanks again for helping to fuel the fire to keep serving this amazing community! #POCFPride!

    • Hi, Elita! Thank you so much for your comment. It’s nice to know other understand this unique lifestyle! One of my firsts WTF moments was wrapping my head around the lack of communication, and how to build a new relationship from that. Definitely a different mindset. What was a revelation for you when you first started dating your fisherman?